It's Painful to watch....

My big boy is awesome! He can be wild, funny, and he is so athletic. The kid can swim like a fish, his basketball ability was shown this weekend at his first game. Sidebar to brag - he scored 16 points and he had 16 rebounds (the team only had 20 pts). I am so happy for him.

Two weeks ago, I got a call from the school nurse, she expressed concern over big boys lack of participation and how quiet he is. I explained that he is painfully shy. In situations such as school where the concept is new, he does (and always has) tended to withdraw and keep quiet. Anyone who has ever been to school can understand, maybe if I just keep quiet they won't call on me (I used to try this one in geometry...). So, I took that phone call as just a concern from his teacher and nothing more.

Yesterday, I took him to a birthday party. It was full of kiddos from his class (it was a party for a girl but a few of the boys where there). We got there and he refused to sit at the table - instead he stood in a corner and picked at his scab (lovely!). Then, I got him to sit after much coaxing and by coaxing I mean threatening to take him home ( I did try nice first but I knew that wouldn't work). Then he wouldn't eat. That concerned one of his little buds to no end. His friend could NOT figure out one wouldn't eat pizza! He did eat cake (no ice cream) that was after I got him a coke (and we don't drink soda unless it is Sprite!). I was really trying and pulling out all of the stops.

It was in that painful 2 hours that I realized that this shyness was a little over the top. I decided to take on some research to see what I could do to help him. I am an extremely social person, as is Princess, there are no strangers just friends.

So I called upon the internet world to help, because if it's on the internet it's got to be true, right?

1st mistake - I realized I was wrong. I was helping him label himself. I oftentimes refer to him as shy. BAD MOMMY! Don't do that.

Oh, 1st good thing I'm, I mean we, are doing. Basketball - he rocks. Enrolling in him in activities that he is good at is good for him! YEA!!!! ME!!!

2nd good thing, I did, find different ways for your child to socialize with children his age. AHA! I did this one too. This year, I broke my own rule and signed him up for 3 fall activities. Basketball, Cub Scouts, and finally tumbling.

Other sources that I read suggested that because he has friends and likes to play and has no trouble in one and one situations that he is probably just overwhelmed. He said he had fun, especially when we broke off to play games and he and I rode the go-karts together.

So, I'm less concerned. I feel that as he gets the self-confidence at school, he will participate more. In large group social situations, he will get it. I just need not to worry not everyone can be extremely social like me.

Oh, and I took princess to a party after that party. I could have left and she never would have known....so independant...



Mwape, Bridget. "10 Things You Can Do To Help a Shy Child". ADD ADHD Advances.com